There's an Eheads fan in all of us.

Warning: Really, really long. And drabblish. I'm an extremely affected fan, what can I say?

One word. Overwhelming.

With all the words I have learned in this life, I can't begin to express the feeling that came over me when the first two percussion notes for Alapaap pealed across the venue, and the four of them appeared onstage.

I seriously wanted to cry.

Out of sheer joy, excitement or whatever. It was really just... overwhelming.

Towards Ligaya
All roads lead to The Fort that night. Traffic slowed down on the way there, but it was bearable. (I only racked up P120 cabfare+tip coming in from Mandaluyong.) The venue was packed to the last square inch, the air was humid and the clusters of clouds loomed overhead, threatening to rain on this once-in-a-lifetime parade. The stage was set too low for everyone (even us at the VIP area) to be able to see the quartet properly. The ginormous video walls did help, but much as they did it defeated the purpose of seeing all four of them together live.

Then again, the fact that this was THE Eraserheads Reunion Concert, and it was music the Eraserheads were loved, adored, worshipped for, everything else was negligible when the first few notes of Alapaap cut through the thick air, and the lights came to life to reveal The Four in all their shining glory.

They didn't really shine-shine, but everyone screamed so loud that they might as well have.

Ely was old-school preppied up in white long-sleeved shirt, white vest and blue tie. Buddy a tad japorms in his red shirt and white jacket (which he peeled off during the third song) combo. Markus was in casual disarray as always) in a red checkered shirt and worn-out jeans. And Rayms... was so dressed down he looked as if he simply got out of bed, put on the nearest available clothing and walked off to the venue. Oh, and right. The eyeliner. (Oh, hail Raymond M.: Rock Lord of All-That-Is-Emo.) He made up for it with his charged-up performance though, so t'was all good.


The First (and Last) Set
The beginning of it all was so magical that it didn't even seem real until they appeared and played onstage.

I kept track of the songs and number of songs... until the fourth. After the fourth, I just let myself get intoxicated with their songs. I can still remember the songs they performed, not in order, and may be missing a song or two:

Alapaap - There were fireworks. Literally and figuratively.
Sembreak - With which Rayms stood up and raised his arms at the crowd. Nubi tells me that he did so because it was him who composed the song.
Hey Jay
Fruitcake - Ely went, "Merry Christmas" prior to the first note, and I just knew. He sang the first line, and let the crowd sing the next lines. Everyone sang along, but most people stumbled with "There's some brandy and star margarine to make it right." part. At this point, Ely began to supply the lyrics.
Kaliwete
Ligaya
Shake Yer Head
Toyang - With the intro "This song... is all about love.", the crowd already went wild. Ely played with the lyrics, "They tried to tells us we're too old / Too old to really be bold." To which the crowd hooted at.
Kailan - I imagined if there were lovers (There were A LOT.) in the crowd at this moment, they would have started slow-dancing.
With A Smile - The song I screamed the loudest for. Favoritest song! I really liked the Southborder version, but nothing - and I mean NOTHING - really beats the original. And LIVE at that.
Kasama Mo Naman Ako
Huwag Mo Na Itanong

I was only in grade school when they rose to stardom, so I really still wasn't the sort of stalkish fan that I am now with the JRock artists I adore. But right then, at that moment when Buddy waved and bowed to the crowd, Markus standing and nodding nonchalantly, Ely and Rayms raising their hands at the millions of us there... It was really an image, a moment, a feeling - an experience - that I will remember for the rest of my life.

Seriously surreal.


The Experience
I've heard their music in my playlist for close to a thousand times before, and a couple hundred more in my elementary years, and cliche as it sounds: nothing REALLY beats hearing it live. Especially after what seemed like an eternity. And most especially for the first time.

I had screamed then, until there was that pesky ringing on my forehead. I waved my hands along with the rest of the adrenaline-high crowd, and bopped my head and the rest of my body to the beat of their music.

Never mind the cute guys that were right beside me at that time, nor the celebrities that were at the same area as I was. When the lights shone on them, every single one of us cared for nothing more than the four of them, and the music that connected the four of them together.

I said that if Ely (or anyone of them) had expressed their intention to run at the 2010 presidential elections at that very moment, he would've won in a landslide.

The band was as cool as ever. Buddy plucked at his guitar ever so casually, as though it was the easiest thing to do in the world. Markus seemed so detached from the fame apparent in the millions of people packed before them. Rayms seemed to have just rolled out of bed and into the venue to play... like a madman.

Only on this night did I come to understand what Sharif meant with good drum-playing. Rayms hit every note HARD, never missed a bit even if often stood up to get the crowd going. Something I think he had to do either because there *was* a lack of interaction, or because old frontman habits are hard to break. Or both. It wasn't distracting though, nor did it take the spotlight from Ely. In my opinion, at least. I actually found it amusing, and representative of how they have grown as people, musicians and performers.

The surreality of it all, however, crash-landed to reality when, after the 20-minute intermission, the band came out sans Ely, and instead with a girl.


Tragedy Strikes
When this gets posted, we would all have known who the girl was and what had happened next.

And by that time, all the miniscule things that seemed wrong and/or pretty trivial at the moment they happened all formed and fit into one big, dark picture.

Ely had come out wearing sunglasses, and I personally thought it was a rockstar-in-concert thing. (I distinctly remembered Ebe in similar fashion when he performed in my Dagupan event at 12 in the morning.) He shook them off (as in SHOOK them of) around about the fifth song; revealing his tired, joyless eyes.

Everyone had also wondered why Ely wasn't interacting with the crowd as frontmen are expected to do. He also wasn't interacting with the rest of the band; something that prompted the crowd to chant "Group hug, group hug!" over and over again. There was also noticeable cracking in his voice whenever he sang, and that frozen smile he gave us in the middle of his performance.

I figured he really didn't want to be there at the moment, but never really thought of why.

Shame on me and the rest of the fan populace that night who momentarily forgot the fact that his mom had just passed away a couple days back, and that despite this and the history of heart failure looming over his head like the clouds in that night's sky; he still chose to push through with the concert to do what he had been doing since the beginning: make everyone happy.

Ely was rushed to the hospital, and his bandmates, his sister, the promotors and the millions of fans gathered there that night bowed their hands in silent prayer, wishing for his speedy recovery.

Buddy continued on apologizing and wishing everyone a safe drive home. I heard him, but I didn't see him 'coz my eyes were pinned on Raymond. Right after they had come out onstage and Buddy introduced themselves (to which the crowd laughed at), Rayms had chosen to sit at the drumset platform corner, with his face buried onto the palm of his hand.

If it were in disbelief, sorrow or regret, I really couldn't tell.


Exodus Home
The VO soon ordered everyone to leave the venue, and when we walked out of the place, we chanced upon the members of Cueshe and Ebe of Sugarfree with his girlfriend leaving along with us. Earlier that evening, the camera had spotted Jay of Kamikazee, and scattered around us in the VIP area then were the likes of Ramon Bautista, Janus del Prado, Earl Ignacio and Yeng Constantino.

It's rather amusing to think that all it takes to even the ground for the likes of celebrities, rockstars, socialites, working people and the common emo tao is the reunion of this quartet and their music.

On the way home, I thought that what had just happened was prolly a nudge from the cosmos for them to go that way and take a cue from Filipino movies.

Tragedy always brings broken people together, remember?

And so hopefully, this would be the best time for the four of them to REALLY reunite, and get back together as the friends they had started out as.

Our fingers will remain crossed for that.